Left-Overs

Another day at home for the most part trying to get to the bottom of whatever has been ailing me. I'm at a loss and would rather not even bother except the episodes are severe enough now that I am not sleeping and missing volunteer activities that are very important to me. I don't have to feel perfect and I know that at 50years old I won't but I wish I could art least feel a bit better, more capable of basic normal activities...

It was quite interesting thinking about my first church, St. Johns Episcopal Church in my post from earlier today. I have always known that it was a very influential place for me. I also realized that I had some very complex and troubling feelings regarding GOD, the Church and Christians/Christianity. It would take nearly 40 years for those complex and nightmarish questions to get answered and only after I made a complete change in my life...focusing all my energy of working with others and living a life dedicated to GOD.

I don't really know if I could even explain WHY I was angry at the church....some of it I know was me shifting anger from certain people to the church at large. Bottom line is that I was just angry and that was that.

I would imagine there might be a couple more posts on this topic coming down the pike in the near future...so keep an eye open for those. I need to shut it down for now...

(PHOTO: Antietam National Battlefield)