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Wednesday, April 8, 2015


Well hello there my dear friends. I am so sorry that these posts are so infrequent these days. I wish I had a better reason for this but with the "Leg THING" and subsequent infections and hospitalizations I simply do not have the strength or desire to write.

Two weeks ago I had surgeries number 14 and 15 for this damn leg, all since I broke my right ankle in February of 2013. I spent another 8 days in the hospital. I basically had the leg re-amputated to remove the infected bone and clean up the end of the stump.

We are tentatively looking at 6-8 weeks and then I could be walking in a prosthesis but frankly I am not that optimistic at the moment. All I can say about that is I know this body now and what feels like what...things do not feel right.

It hurts to much, is too swollen and isn't responding well to the latest anti-biotic (which I been on a half-dozen times before.) But I don't see the doc until this coming Tuesday so we will see.

Thats as far as I am going to go this time around.I am really hurting...SOUL PAIN I call it. I am tired, weary, physically I am in agony more often then not and I cannot walk without crutches or a walker going on 6 months now with little noticeable change or HOPE in sight.

I want to feel good about this latest procedure and stay positive but honestly I am not really capable. I've hung tough for a long F-ing time but I am coming to the end of my endurance...I have limits too I suppose.

I will try to continue to post as usual on this Blog but I am reluctant to do so right now because Shell Shock is supposed to be  about my life and frankly....My life is brutal right now and most people do not care about it or want to hear it. 

I'm not trying to be dramatic just honest. It's just a fact that folks don't want to read negative stuff online. They have troubles of their own. 

Thank all of you for your support...I'll continue to hold on and hang in there.