I am feeling completely turned around right now emotionally. I'm running a fever, much like I did for the entirety of last summer and I am pissed because it is for the exact same reason: My leg is badly infected.
But for reasons my close friends will understand...I am not going off on the usual tangent tonight about my health or medical issues and I am particularly not going to make any kind of comment about Doctors and the way they practice medicine these days.
I'm extra emotional this night because a friend is quite ill and I care about him and his wife.
Honestly I marvel at the fact that after all these years of pain, suffering and the many attempts to suppress my emotions by drinking/drugging them away, it totally shocks me to my very core that I still have the ability to feel and to care about others.
As a matter of fact...it is only that ability and willingness to love and care for people that has allowed me to retain my humanity throughout all of this inhuman treatment and experience and for that I am grateful.
Sorry my friends....no rambling monologue tonight, just prayer for my friends Mike and Kathy.
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