Wednesday, November 20, 2013
Transparency & TRUTH
One of the greatest assets I have from living a spiritual life in recovery is the relationships I have been so privileged to be a part of. For the first time in my life I have true....I mean REAL friends...who cut through the BS and deal with any situation that may arise. They'll fight for me, help me, hurt for me and I for them....without a shadow of a doubt.
Most importantly of all...they will with out question ALWAYS tell me the truth.
Today I received a PM on FaceBook from a friend who attends my church and he had some things he wanted to share with me. Some were supportive and complimentary and some were what I would consider....constructive criticism.
Those of you who know me personally know that I am a temperamental ...even a "touchy" SOUL when it comes to negative feedback. I could and still can be rather quick with an "F-U" when faced with criticism if I am not in a good balanced spiritual place. And that my friends is the key...Spiritual BALANCE.
In the end I agreed with some of what he said...and some I thought was a bit much but the bottom line truth is this: I really appreciate the fact he took the time to basically "Have my Back" by hitting me with some hard truths and questions. These statements, questions and critiques were offered in the most positive of ways and with LOVE. The man cares about me...he knows my story and doesn't want to see me shoot my "mouth" off on the blog and get hurt in return.
As a result of this exchange of messages today i was able to admit some hard facts about myself. Below is a direct quote as I explain that I know a great deal about what my weak areas are:
"Unfortunately but rather typically I am a "work in progress". Certainly that is NOT God's doing, He saved me and gave me a new life. It is My WILL, My Demons, Suspicions, Prejudices, Fears and an inability to forgive that always holds me back and creates the anger and resentment that at times will continue to drive a wedge between myself and others. Hey...I want to be respected, understood and forgiven but I am often not good at giving others those very same basic, important things".
Needless to say this arrogant old boy NEVER used to admit that I had flaws...of course I always knew what they were...but would never let YOU know that I knew. No that wouldn't do.
It took a while to get used to living life in this transparent and very visible way. But the rewards of doing so were so much greater then the alternative that I now cannot imagine trying to live that old life of secrets, illusions and LIES. The TRUTH my friend...ROCKS!!