What's UP...DOC??!!

It has been almost a week since I had the last of the tests done to verify that I am clear me of the infection and to get a most recent C/T Scan of the Tibia injury so the Doc can know what's going on in there. But I still have not heard anything back about the results and scheduling the surgery so tomorrow I will need to call them and find out what's up for myself.

Needless to say that after dealing with the original ankle injury/surgery and subsequent infection since early March of this year, (That's 6 FREAKIN" months folks!!) I am more then impatient and I want answers and results. And NO I do not think that is asking too much...it's been 6 f***ing months already...c'mon!

The truly odd and funny thing is in reality part of me really doesn't want to get on with it because I am fearful about the outcome. Even if everything thing goes exactly as planned it is going to be extremely difficult, time consuming and painful for a really long, long time. 

Plus I need to give the Doc permission to remove my right leg 6" below my knee if he get's in there and finds that it is much worse then we expect and realistically that could happen. So I have to feel comfortable with that decision or we will have to go through the entire surgical and decision making process all over again and I do not want to go there...PERIOD!

I have to admit I do NOT want to lose my leg....now that may not surprise anyone but in some ways this whole thing would be much easier, less painful and much shorter in duration if I just chose amputation out-right from the very beginning. But in my heart I am just NOT there. I am OK making the decision to take it of if once he is in there he sees that it is such a freaking MESS that amputation is the ONLY reasonable choice. But I am not ready to go there if it looks like we might be able to make a Fusion work.

So Tomorrow I'll dig deep and call for the details. Until then my FRIENDS!