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Friday, November 16, 2012

She's A Smoothie!

K moved here to this area in late January of this year. She had no job, little $$ and no real functional car. She was leaving a life that had very little promise or hope for a healthy, happy life. It was all manipulation, lies, head-games and criticism. I've never known anyone in my entire life who was told from the day they were born that they were stupid. That is how certain dominant members of her family "nurtured and loved" her. Yet she persevered...

SICK doesn't even come close to describing it. She was taught to lie, to take advantage, to pretend everything was fine. A sense of entitlement was a way off life. taking advantage of others was and is second nature to them...

Unbeknownst to me when I first met Kim, a family member of hers (Uncle, Mom's side) basically de-fraud-ed our (my X and I) home owners Insurance policy when his wife (a college friend of my X) cat-sit for us. He got hammered, let the cat outside by accident then she bit him as he drunkenly frightened the crap out of her trying to grab her. He was basically fine after an anti-biotic but we felt terrible so we offered to file the claim with our home owners insurance who said they would pay the out of pocket medical expense. We gave him the number to our agent, he took over and fraud-ed them out of a considerable sum for questionable medical expenses.  Even our Insurance Agent (I still have her, she is now a close friend) knew he was a scam. This incident destroyed the friendship between my X and her friend from school. No matter to either of them, the $$ was more important then friendship...our ethics...or dignity.

I was never really convinced that K-Sue would ever be able to completely turn her life around because of the incredible adversity she faced...but she really has mad the change. It wasn't because she isn't a good person or not worth's just that she had so much baggage, it looked to me (and to her) to be an insurmountable mountain to climb. But it wasn't and she has turned things all the way around...It hasn't been easy...mainly because she didn't believe that God would help her and she didn't believe she was worthy of such help. She thought she was trash, with such an upbringing, how could she not...and that part, so obvious to me...always broke my heart.

Because beneath the negative learned behavior is a real GEM of a human being   ...yea, it's cliche but it fits like a glove: She truly was a diamond in the rough. When she came here, with no support at all from her family. They still don't speak to her 11 months later except through hateful, embarrassing public FaceBook Comments...yep, they are a real class act.

She has done this basically by good old fashioned hard work....working for a temp agency, taking any job they would give her. Traveling 50 minutes each way to work, working off shifts, doing menial, dirty scut work that most employees won't do. She never missed a day at work on any of those jobs. It was that dedication that that showed me and everyone else she had the right stuff do do whatever she had to do to succeed.

In my past I never would have stuck by her side....I was too selfish. I wanted the easy way out, working through this kind of frustration and heart-ache wasn't part of my plan. Even today my selfishness can and will occasionally override my compassionate side but it is much better. But not this time...NO, I just sensed that there was something special here and there is. I very grateful for K-Sue and having her in my life.

There is not nearly enough space here tonight for me to list all the obstacles that K has over-come to get to to this place. Most people wouldn't have believed me anyway...they would have assumed I was bias and exasperating the adversity she faced and her effort in overcoming it. 

It doesn't matter now because the most important thing is that today, SHE believes in herself and trusts that God has a plan and it really shows.

This originally ROUGH Diamond has become a Smoothie!


  1. Well done to K but also, you should give yourself a pat on the back, for being there. Her story might have been very different if it wasn't for your help.

    1. You are too kind my friend, thank you. I sit back now and think how many times I could have helped her so much more then I did. Of course it's spilled milk now but a lesson learned for the future!