Walk on....

I'm beginning to wonder if I'll ever just get numb to the suffering of others....

At this particular time in my life, I have a few good friends that are really going through a hard time. Some with personal issues to work through another couple with serious health issues or loved ones w/very serious health issues. I realize that is the way life goes sometimes but honestly it just seems like so many are hurting all at once. Sort of out of proportion w/the norm, 'ya know?

As a person who cares about their friends, it's really getting hard because there isn't a lot you can do at times but offer support. Frankly that just doesn't seem like enough. It leaves me feeling pretty powerless to  actually do anything. One thing I have known about myself for a long time is that I don't like NOT having control! Sounds arrogant but it's honest....

Perhaps I'm just getting more realistic and caring more intensely about how other people suffer as opposed to looking inward all the time. I think I was just selfish and oblivious when I was a younger man, since I've gotten older I feel more connected to the human race instead of this troubled, rogue individualist who cares only about getting his...it's quite a transition and one that I sense isn't complete. Not by a long shot.

I don't know if I was any more self absorbed and selfish then anyone else but I realize today that my selfishness toward others created an imbalance in my life. It knocked me off my spiritual square, so to speak. It took some freakin' hard knocks in life to get me to realize how great it is to help others. I sense another door is opening....do you?