Worth The TROUBLE

Oh my, it is already 9a Saturday morning and I am hoping I still have the motivation to write something but I am at a loss to know what that actually might be...it lingers there...just beyond my comprehension.

There are certain areas or aspects of my life that I have traditionally just not done very well and it is very hard to admit and accept that. Because these "things" of which I speak also involve real people I happen to care about, I cannot in good conscience elaborate anymore on the details out of respect for their privacy but certain current events in my life are digging up similar scenarios and I'll be very honest, I don't really know what to do.

In the past I always tried to do what I considered the right thing to do...even if this decision led me into situations that were embarrassing or hurtful to me...I thought I was sacrificing for the sake of others. The problem was that they could have cared less what I was doing or why...I was just a fool. Now, I am once again facing a similar scenario and I have some decisions to make. In the past I never felt appreciated for doing what I thought was right and more importantly, I had serious doubts myself whether it was really the right course of action to be taking.

This time around I am giving some serious thought to not going through with it. I'm sure that my doing this will cause folks to be upset with me but as I just wrote...I went through with it in the past and nobody seemed to even notice so I figure why bother...Today I know that it's OK to put myself first at times...I can take care of myself without feeling guilty. I will add that this decision has come only after many days of thought and contemplation plus a great deal of personal meditation and reflection.

But there will still probably be a price to pay...I'm sure but today I am worth the trouble!