There are certainly events and time periods in my life where it does begin to seem like something "bigger," and more mysterious (Read: like GOD or KARMA or Batman's "JOKER") seems to be directing the events taking place in my life. And I don't mean like we need to let go and let God take charge kind of thing...no I mean something more akin to an evil villain, diabolically directing things from behind the scenes (Like the JOKER in a BATMAN Movie)and trying to make my life as miserable as possible while he DESTROYS ME!!!
Well I'm sort of kidding about that but not completely...it does seem like the timing of a lot of this CRAP I am dealing with such as my health couldn't be worse...almost like Our EVIL Villain is "piling on the pain" when it isn't necessary...Dude, you already have my attention...what do you need from me now...my SOUL? Oddly the answer to that question is more then likely...YES.
I realize this seems like a lot of Pie in the sky stuff for many folks but after so many of my life experiences....I don't think I can really question it...I need to keep the focus off of ME and "MY PROBLEMS" BooHoo!! And keep focused on living my life for HIM...ultimately I don't see it as "my life" anymore anyway...it is HIS life.
DINNER calls so I'll leave this topic on the table and may continue, revisit or ignore it like I never wrote the dang thing, lol!
And more often then not in this day to day existence I get that and understand the concept completely but it's not uncommon sometimes when life seems harder then it should be, when I take my eyes OFF GOD and discouragement sets in that I wander off track and find myself mired in BDD's (Black Dog Day's...otherwise known as DEPRESSION). But it passes...
Today I feel discouraged not so much because of my own siruation with my health and pain that not only is not improving but getting worse....
(PHOTO: Kathy Tomson)
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