Saturday, May 12, 2012
A Little Clarity..
Yesterday I posted something I titled Too Busy Having Fun even though the post for the most part wasn't about having fun. I was having fun with a cheeky title but it made me think for a second about that very subject: doing stuff that's fun.
It probably seems weird to blog about because people have fun all the time but since there is a rather serious nature to this blog, with the subject matter I deal with, it can often seem as if that is all I do: sit around in therapy, coping with terrible tragedies from the past, learning how to live life all over again, etc. And then writing about it here.
And yep, that stuff did happen and there a time when it did seem as if all I was doing was picking up the pieces, trying to figure out how I was going to make it...it was a scary, confusing time. But the majority of my life today is filled with positive stuff, lot's of it. Because of the nature of Shell Shock serenade I probably don't do a good enough job representing that side of my life. Because if life wasn't rewarding, fun, exciting, interesting...etc, why in the world would I want to even bother going through all of this.
And that is a really relevant point. I am going to try and include more of that side of things as we launch into the future here on SSS. Part of my hesitation to talk about that part of my life is that I am a bit shy about sharing that side of me. I know it will sound ridiculous to readers that I am saying that I am shy after sharing all the "gory": details to my life's story but I am very blessed considering the life I live.
I know a lot of my readers are still really hurting, they have just gotten sober, they are in terrible financial trouble, their marriage or relationships are falling apart...they hate themselves right now. Do they really want top read about me, living on an island, going out on the boat, spending some quality time with my girlfriend?
I think it's important that they know life like that is possible...that I was in the very same hopeless place they were and are yet now, after getting sober, having a relationship with my CREATOR...this is what has happened. But I want to be sensitive...I take NO credit for this life I have...if I didn't believe it was the work of God, I would have just said I was incredibly lucky and very fortunate. Yes I've hung in there, I've worked hard for what seemed like little or no return for a long, long time...but I didn't EVER do it alone...I had a great deal of help from family, friends...even strangers in recovery circles.
So I will try to include more stuff from my everyday life but I want to keep it all in perspective. It's a nice, pleasant morning and I am very, very sore. I usually go to meet with the ladies today but They had something going on today so I am not reading this morning. I'm going to go for a walk.
(PHOTO: Kathy Tomson)