"FORTY"

 

A person's age is a relative thing and frankly I don't pay a whole lot of attention to how old someone is unless they are doing something considered odd or unusual for their age. Sky diving at 85 years old...graduating college at 13 years and so on. But otherwise after I turned 21 and could "legally" drink, well that was the last time my age really mattered as far as I'm concerned..until today...er, well really tomorrow.

To Kim...birthdays are important and they always have been. Tomorrow...Kim...my dear Kimmi turns 40 years old and I think she is excited but with a bit of hesitation. She will always be 10 years younger then me so I'll always be the old fart of our "team". I would say she is far more excited about the prospect of turning 40 then not...probably because she has come so far and her life is so much better today then ever before!

I typically don't celebrate B-days other then a card and going out to dinner. I think in a way I've always felt "ageless or timeless" so it never mattered to me...I think two things influenced my thinking about my birthday and in turn those of other people: my belief in reincarnation and getting raped. 

If a person believes they lived before, perhaps hundreds of years accumulating then how old am I really. Of course my belief is changing so I'm not sure what THAT deal is anymore. I stopped being a child the moment I was raped and became an ancient, OLD MAN...never to know youth, joy or innocence again.

But lately I have been trying to see things differently....and not be an old stick in the mud. I'm actually quite concerned about tomorrow because birthdays mean so much that Kim is really going to get hurt when her family won't acknowledge her tomorrow and I know they won't.

She'll get a Face Book wish from a family member or two but that's it. I doubt her X will even let her daughter call her. K-Sue will be strong, act tough...but it kills her inside and I really hurt for her. I cannot accept the way these people have treated this very special human being that I'm proud to call my fiance but even better...my BEST FRIEND. It's criminal and inexcusable and they should be ashamed of themselves.....so I fear tomorrow is going to hurt Kimmi as much as she'll enjoy it.

She isn't the type to take time off for a birthday...Her peers at work think she is nuts for coming in but I never took my Birthday off either. But I'll try and make it memorable in a good way. We'll go out to  eat though her favorite place around here CARUSO's is closed on Mondays so not sure where she wants to go.

So if you see K-Sue tomorrow...let her have it about being OLD...she'll love you for it!