Saturday, March 3, 2012
Run MY Black Dog To DEATH, Have Courage...Dig in a Bit Then TRY IT!
It is not unusual after going through the emotional upheaval that is a result of re-visiting my Sexual Assault (SA) experience that I can experience a dose of my Black Dog (BD) or Depression. Today however turned out a bit differently because there was some positive news related to Kim's life and living arrangements.
I will not go into detail for several reasons: it's too personal and does not need to be announced to the world but more then anything else...these plans/opportunities and possibilities are all in a constant state of FLUX...they change all the time so we have learned not to get our hopes up when things look positive but we also see no point in getting our friends/families hopes up either.
But all that being said there is a rather good and practical possibility that has been presented to Kim today about a place...an affordable place to live. That of course has been a major concern and one we both have had to turn over to the Lord because fretting about it all this time would have made us both crazy already. It looks like a very good situation financially and we drove out there and physically it looks good too.
Now we need practical details and there is the simple fact that with Kim's responsibilities toward her kids child support, etc. that she cannot afford even the cheapest of places by herself. This means we are thinking about expediting our marriage plans. This is something we have been prepared to do and neither one of us is is afraid of taking that step. We are as prepared as you can probably be emotionally, psychologically and to a lesser degree physically. Spiritually we are really probably the most ready...we have been taking a marriage counseling course and counseling through our church and feel that GOD is with us on this.
So if we need to move a bit faster then planned I think we are probably more excited then fearful about it yet we are not naive, or unprepared...we do know what lies ahead...I think we welcome the challenge together knowing our marriage this time around will be a spiritually strong one....That gives us great comfort, confidence and determination to face whatever adversity may occur with grit and courage.
(Painting by: Don Troiani - 24th Michigan "Iron Brigade" makes a stand at Gettysburg) http://www.historicalartprints.com/