Sunday, April 8, 2012
Outta-Whack and Restless= CONCERNED
I am restless tonight, feeling a bit "off-center" and when things in my life feel unbalanced it is usually a sign that something is not OK in my little 'ole neck of the woods. I used to ignore this kind of "nudge" but have learned the hard way that it isn't a good idea. I realize it may sound like I'm making a mountain out of a mole hill but typically that isn't the case...there usually is something "outta-whack". Now to find out what it is that isn't sitting right inside.
This is the almost automatic emotional evaluation process that takes place now and it has saved me a lot of heart-ache and difficulty. I used to ignore my emotions until things things got so bad that I was in trouble....real trouble. In the early days of my recovery I discovered that the risk to my sobriety was far greater when I was stressed or feeling troubled. I realize to most people that is simply logical...well logical is not how I would describe a person in the first months of their recovery! I wasn't really capable of reasoning my way through things...I just reacted to circumstances as they happened.
Of course today, things are much different but still it is critical to be aware of how I'm feeling and stay in touch with my emotions.
Now after saying all that I still am not certain what is causing my uncomfortable feeling today but usually it isn't just one thing but a combination of things. I suspect that's the case today as well. I know my health is a concern and certainly the increased physical pain is an issue as well. It is also a transitional period in my life, Kim is in the process of moving to her new (permanent) place down the street and my parents are headed back from Florida starting today.
So I imagine that it's the combination of "all the above" that is leading me away from a place of peace and serenity to one of worry and stress. I find that taking some extra time to reflect and meditate helps reduce the stress. And for me prayer always helps bring back the various scattered pieces of my spiritual self back together and that is huge. Once the spiritual side of me is together the rest of me seeems to follow ...even the painful physical stuff seems to ease up some....who knows why but it's true.
Before I close this morning I want to wish everyone a very Happy Easter Sunday!