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Tuesday, September 27, 2011


"Catching Hell" is the name of an ESPN Films 30 for 30 special on some of baseballs more infamous episodes relating to catching the baseball. Bill Bucker letting the ball slip through his legs in the 1986 World series against the NY Mets and Steve Bartman potentially interfering with a foul ball that could very well have kept the Chicago Cubs out of the 2003 World Series.

I didn't even intend to watch this program though i knew it was going to be on. Frankly these two stories tend to bum me out. Well I was sifting through the channels, saw it was on and off course I watched those two episodes on Buckner and Bartman. Sheesh, I wish I hadn't...I literally feel like my childhood dog Pepe' died all over again!

Ach, what a strange and melancholy day this has been.This is one of those days I was thinking of when I posted yesterday about the intensity of my emotions. Man I wish I could turn these suckers off at times cause I would rather not deal with them all the time. I often think I just care too much about stuff. But that is part of who and what I am. I hope it is what makes me a more loyal friend, a more dedicated employee, a more loving family member and a more caring person.

But I get carried away. There are times that I really wish I was a bit more calloused, that I could just let stuff roll off my back a bit more. Because tonight, I let a freaking TV show eat my lunch basically and snuff out what glimmer of good memory was left of this forgettable, weary and gloomy day.

You know what is MOST ironic about my description of this day just past? Nothing significant happened negatively yet to me it was an unpleasant day because I let a whole bunch of small setbacks and hiccups build up  and have a pee on my parade....I should know better!

But if there is one thing that I have discovered about myself over time it's that I either FEEL or I don't...there is no middle ground. My emotions are either switched ON or switched OFF, it's truly black or white. So I feel intensely about everything I feel. That actually is something I am trying to not react so strongly to insignificant stuff. I haven't had a great deal of success with that as of yet but I'm still plugging away....

So I am not sure why I feel compelled to mention it here but I do... I feel like I experienced a terribly difficult day when in fact, my day was really pretty good, certainly at worst it was OK. I let a couple of emotional "downers" influence and basically mark the entire day as a "bummer" when in reality it wasn't. I really have some work to do there...but change all starts with recognition of the issue so I'm at least on my way.

I'll close here and go back for a second to the two B's: Buckner and Bartman. I can't imagine what they must have felt like. Buckner, frankly he has always handled it like the Pro he was and is. In big time sports, there is a chance of that kind of thing happening EVERY TIME you walk onto the field of play. It comes with the territory for a professional or big-time athlete. 

But the Bartman that was and is truly awful. I haven't a clue what happened to him but for a long time I often wandered if there would be a news story some day that he had tragically killed himself or something. I sure hope not because he did what any of us would have done were we in his exact place. I doubt he lives in the Chicago area...Honestly, someone in Miami probably should have bought him a home or something...the Marlins should have taken care of him for life! 

Any way both stories are sad and show how unreasonable a "Mob Mentality" can be because that is exactly what that is...a mob rules kind of behavior. Well I am gonna try and put this all behind me and turn in for the night so...Good Night All!