A God Thing?

I am shaking in me boots....Naw, not really.

I am going to do something later on this morning that I didn't think I would ever even contemplate doing: I'm going to sit and have coffee with a pastor from a local church. Yep the old self proclaimed "God Hater" is gonna have a discussion with the minister of a church that a friend of mine attends.

I know this sounds like an overreaction but when I turned away from the Christian Church at the age of 12, I turned and boogied so far in the opposite direction that I didn't think I'd ever consider looking back. I blamed God for the painful things that happened and were happening in my life: Addiction, Rape, Feelings of alienation, etc. I could not accept that there might be a purpose for those things, that I could not only survive them but indeed grow from the experience.

But since I try to have some balance in my life today, my buddy suggested a chat with this fellow and frankly, I'm really looking forward to it. Plus I love sitting and Chillin' at a coffee shop, even more so on a cold winter's day with snow possible so that's a double bonus right there.

I don't know where I am headed in regards to my spiritual life. I am right now at the point where I will acknowledge that I have one...and that's it. I don't know if it's just thinking , feeling  and accepting that there is a spiritual side to life or if I'm on a path to some more formal, organized (read:Church Attendance) spiritual endeavor.

I simply choose not to sweat the details of it today, I'm going with an open mind and heart, plus as I said I'm looking forward to the experience. We shall see what happens...